So I'm back after a long break with many things to talk about but I can't seem to decide which to begin with.
After the wedding there was the holiday which ended in an accident. I split my head open and wasn't allowed to fly home! That was a joy, not. Getting money out of the insurance company is like trying to remove a boisterous drunk at closing time.
Then I moved and went off sick from work!
All these things have long stories attached but now I'm finally here to send something out into the ether I find that I do n ot wish to talk about these things. Instead I'd like to share a first draft of a story I'm writing. It'll probably make no sense as it is the beginning of a novel which in fact a sequel to another I am writing. So if you've got that straight, enjoy reading and hopefully you may be moved enough to leave me a critical review as I need some feedback:
“So I’m destined to repeat the mistakes of my ancesters, is that what you’re trying to tell me?” Sera was frustrated by the relentless bleating of Professor Graham. Nearly four years of tuition had brought many fruitless hours of conversations that did not advance her training. Her other classes were practical and relevant to what she believed faced her out there in the Realms. What use was philosophy when you were being attacked? It was not talking that had saved her from the demon in the woods that rainy morning nearly four years ago. Had it really been that long?
The time following the incident, as it was now referred to as, had passed her by in a daze. The Senate council had been alled immediately and it had seemed they were now willing to take Sera’s claim seriously. Rigorous testing ensued involving all kinds of instruments that she had never seen before and combat exercises that seemed never-ending.
After a lengthy two month period of quarantine it had been decided that she was not a threat and was indeed a Guardian. They had then undertaken a course of strict study and monitoring which had filled the interim period.
“Travelling doesn’t necessarily mean travelling in circles Sera.” Master Graham spat out, exhasperated. “Not all of us are doomed to make the same mistakes over again. You are given these new chances to right the wrong and break the cycle.”
“But then if it is my destiny to right these so called wrongs why on earth would I have been sent to the Second realm?” Said Sera, pulled away from her memories. “Why not place me here where I was supposed to be?”
“It is not for us to understand how these experiences will change the overall outcome. We are only journeymen on the road of Mother Fate.” Master Graham stood, removing himself from behind the desk and motioning out the window as he said this. Sera ground her teeth at this gesture. It was precisely these pompous moves that she detested. They reeked of the ceremonial and outdated ways of the council.
“Surely though it would have been better for me to be here learning the information I need to fulfil my role.”
“You are the Guardian whether you are trained or not. It is not of importance.” He stated in clipped tones. Sera could feel his annoyance. Master Graham always prickled at the questioning way Sera communicated, like each question was an affront to his Religious and philosophical beliefs. In fact it was the opposite.
“Then why am I here?” Said Sera slyly. She knew well enough the time and effort the masters were putting into training her. She was too old and time was short. The frustration of fitting 10 years of training in, in less than half that time was taking it’s toll on them.
“Let us not be sidetracked,” Master Graham smiled ruefully. “To return to our point. Where you need to be is not necessarily where you are but it is when you are.”
“Huh?” They had moved onto the part of the lesson that made no sense to Sera. Every lesson was started easily enough and then somewhere along the line Sera became completely lost. When this first happened she had thought it was because she was being dim. As the lessons continued she discovered that it was Master Graham’s way to talk in riddles and obscurities. At some point she may understand what he was getting at but most occasions she ended up more confused than when they had started.
“Everybody is born to the time to which they belong. But it is a very intricate thing to deliver each person to his or her rightful time. People are not just reincarnated straight from grave to birthing room in the same day. That kind of crass thinking would have us all believe it is only happenstance or chance that places us.”
Master Graham paused briefly, glancing out of the low north window into the water meadow, lost in thought.
“Fate places us when we can do most good or, in your case, when it is time for a fresh try at a problem.”
“Ok I get that part. That I am destined to repeat a previous life.” She said dully. This had been a reccuring theme of her lessons. Reincarnation and respecting and channelling our past life experiences was a favourite subject of Master Graham’s.
“Not repeat, no. But you are on the right track.” He smiled again, this time the generous smile that kept Sera coming back to these tedious classes. “It is your destiny to redo what was undone.”
“Right,” Sera smiled back unable to help herself. His smile lifted the entire room like the warm autumn glow which she missed in these cold winter months. “But that still doesn’t explain why I was not placed somewhere I’d be noticed. Then I could have received my training and be better prepared for what lies ahead.”
“It is very tricky to deliver someone to their time. It is precise and complicated.” Sera rolled her eyes and Master Graham elaborated. “We have several possibilities as to why this happened. Mother fate has a lot to juggle and people cannot always be placed where they are needed. It is most important that they are when they should be. A person can move location with a few minor alterations from fate. It would then be easier to place a soul if there was less emphasis on getting the exact location correct.”
“So you’re saying that it was not important where I grew up just that I could be manoeuvred into position when I had?” Understanding was beginning find her, a pinprick of light deep in the dark cavity of her mind.
“Possibly,” he said. Still smiling he strolled back towards his desk and positioned himself behind the neatly stacked papers of other classes. Sera wondered whether those other classes also had trouble following him. “But this is not the only theory on the subject.
“Some believe that you were born and moved exactly as you were destined to. That your journey so far is the correct one to prepare you for the road ahead. There are of course those who feel the opposite.” His smile faltered as a remembered conversation flitted in to his mind and then was easily brushed aside. “Those who find your upbringing a hindrance to your role as Guardian, who think that had you had the correct length of training you would be stronger or that your attitude is not conducive to the role you will have to assume.”
“Like Councillor Watt?” There was a silence that followed Sera’s admission that she knew of at least one person who was opposed to her eventual appointment as Guardian. She had never considered that he was not the only one to feel this way and now she thought about it she felt stupid not to have realised. Of course there were many that would not accept her. That thought she was not capable. “What do you believe?”
“I believe Fate knows more of these things than we do.” Master Graham neatly dodged the question by hiding behind his philosophies. “It is not for me to question the path she sets us forth along. She guides us the best she can and we end up at the right point, so who am I to pass judgement. Besides where would the fun be if we had nowhere to go and no journey to travel? I would not wish that kind of life for anyone.”
“I guess there’d be no point.” Sera pondered the words of Master Graham letting them seep through her brain. Somewhere amongst the nonsense the whole picture was beginning to unfold.
“I think the thing to remember is that you may be reliving a past connection but that does not mean it will play out the same. As you stated earlier, what would be the point?”
“Hmmm”
“Your experiences to this point have altered the way in which it takes place. You are the product of that journey and it will influence your decisions. Do not be ashamed of the way you arrived here, embrace it. By changing the circumstances the outcome changes. Whether that is for the good or no only time will tell. I do not know if even Fate could tell you.”
